The Sexual Double Standard

Being a woman is hard, not only because of that time of the month but because society has not made it easy to not be a man.

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The topic of feminism and women’s rights has recently been at an all time high because women still get paid less money then men and some women in the world have far less rights then we do in the United States. I’ve come to accept and love that I am a woman, and I’m going to have to work 10x harder because of that however I have not (nor will ever) come to accept the double standards we’ve been given.

Recently I’ve noticed this topic of feminism (at least on Facebook & Twitter) has been deeply related to sex, sexual organs, sexual reproduction and so on. Women like Kim Kardashian, Beyonce, and Nicki Minaj are being praised for showing off their sexuality by some, but being seriously hated on my others. A woman showing, loving, and embracing her body for what it is and does is seen as the worst thing she can do for her reputation.

You know the famous “walk of shame”? Well why is it that for a woman it’s a walk of embarrassment but for men it’s a walk of pride, that they’re often praised for, hmmmm? If a man has sex with 4- 6 women it’s seen as not enough, but if a woman does it’s seen as way too much. If a man talks about his popular sexual life, he’s associated with positive terms like player, pimp, “da man”, and so on. But once again when a woman does the same thing she is labeled with harsh and negative terms such as whore and slut. In some parts of the world women are burned, or have their clitoris cut off because they are comfortable with their sexuality. Why is this the type of world we live in!?

I’m going to get very personal here readers and you can say what you want but I truly don’t care. .. so when I was 18 I lost my virginity. That person who took my sacred “v-card” told all his friends and their friends the very private details of our experience, I was extremely hurt. I felt disgusting, and now everyone knew that I had sex. After a long sobbing talk with my mom sent me an email I still hold close to my heart this say, part of it said:

“Own your sexuality. You are a woman, you no longer are obligated to hide it or be ashamed of it. use it sparingly, because there are real feelings attached to it. But you are a woman, say hell yeah, I did it and I did it well. Own it. If you are grown enough to do it, you should be grown enough to embrace it. Don’t ever allow anyone to judge you based on it. That is between you and God, no one else. How often do you hear boys or men judged on their sexual behavior. Never.”

One the biggest issues of feminism is how much control man has over the definition and decisions of a female body. First birth control, and abortion now who,what,where,why,and how we have sex. No thank you. I really hope that one day we can eventually eliminate the double standard and all enjoy our sexual choices equally.


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